Dating has been super hard the last few years. Genuinely a lot of it is hard, for absolutely no reason at all. I’ve experienced so much, personally and from watching the experiences of those around me. From both the male and female perspective, so there is noooooo gender bias over here, honey. I definitely understand the mindset, the concept and all of the unnecessarily hurt feelings. So, F*** YOU and Your Representative. Straight like that, and I’ll explain why.
This may be something you want to float past, if you aren’t comfortable with yourself. I don’t care to be reprimanded. If you’re offended.. you may want to check yourself.
F*** YOU and Your Representative
It’s 2018, and we’re still running into f*ck boys and girls; or I should say, f*ck MEN and WOMEN. IN 2018!!!! But why? We live in a time where, there is slight blend within the Xennials and the Millennials (A.K.A Generation Y). We’re co-mingling and dating within BOTH generations, which is expected, since some, exist between both generations depending on their date of birth. **Xennials are between the ages of 33-43 and Millennials are between the ages of 24 and 38. We are literally, floating between generations trying to find decent humanbeings. Which for the record, can be weird in itself depending on the age of your parents, *Gags*.
Everybody can be trash. Men, women….. TRASH
Listen, anytime that you have to fake who you are to bait someone in, you are trash. Stop using this “representative” and be your whole trump self out here. Give people the opportunity to choose if you, in your splendid bullsh*t glory, is who and what they are looking for. Stop disrupting the lives of people that you KNOWWWWW you should leave alone. It’s messy and it’s trifling, just in case you were unaware. We are supposed to be adults. I’m tired of watching my friend’s get warped into BS relationships, because the person’s poker persona was entirely too good to pass up and now that the individual just knows they have that person hooked, they are showing their true selves. People ask all of the time, why date someone if you know or knew that they were trash at the time. Honestly, when the representative is just that damn good, you don’t see it or maybe they just choose not to. And the minimum amount of red flags that we bypass, is ridiculous, just because everything else seems worth it.
Men, stop pretending to be considerate. Fake caring about her life and what she’s been through. Stop pretending to be overly ambitious and super confident. Stop pretending to be consistent just to “win the game.” Be exactly who are what you are going to be when you get her. That passive aggressive attitude you like to throw out there, do that when y’all first meet. Show her that you are truly insecure and you don’t like her male and possibly her female friends, either. Show her that you don’t aspire to be anything more than you are. That you’re stressful. That you go MIA often. And that you just say the things that sound good, and not what represents who you are.
MESSAGE:::::: Women are not exempt. You don’t get a “get out of F*ck girl jail” free card. You deserve to be called out on your foolishness too. Stop pretending to be okay with that man’s lifestyle and once you’ve baited him in, try to change him and his life. You knew, exactly who and what he was before you chose to be with him. You were excited about partaking in that lifestyle before you had a title. Don’t pretend to be with the get down, if you aren’t. Stop pretending to be fake supportive, when you know damn well his *insert hobby here* is trash. Don’t pretend to be a vegan, okay with his smoking and drug intake, him not having a job, etc. And then complain about who he is JUST because he “wifed” you. Stop chasing his wallet. Stop having expectations for this person simply because of your DREAMS.
We should also be accountable in the role we play in the fu*kery
We tend to allow people to show us this inconsistent representation of themselves without calling them out on their bullsh*t. If you see something that doesn’t add up, let them know. Instead, we ignore everyyyyy red flag, due to them doing the bare minimum. We’re applauding people for being decent human beings. Decent freaking human beings. There is almost always a Catch 22, the question is, how bad is it, and is it something you are willing to compromise on. Sometimes, people pop up with a brand new persona and we wonder “who the hell is this, and what happened to the person that I met?” You know damn well it isn’t, and you need to drop that situation and go on about your business. You don’t deserve passive aggressiveness, inconsistency, lies and more. Let them know that YOU see it. Don’t play the deaf and blind fool.
Do better.. Simply do better
It’s 2018. Saying “no” is okay. Having standards is okay. Choosing yourself first, is definitely okay. Stop allowing yourself to fall for the BS, simply because you think no one else will come in the place of this individual. Stop tying yourself to people because of sex, your clock is ticking or your family is peer pressuring you to have a family and be married. There is no rush. There is no reason to settle and stick with people that don’t value or regard you. You have the ability to say that you are not interested or simply, “THIS IS NOT WHAT YOU WANT!”. Stop allowing people to interrupt your life with their mediocrity. Stop playing naïve. Stop holding on to something that is clearly not for you. Let go of their representative and most importantly their potential. Just because you see the greatness in an individual doesn’t mean that at they see it for themselves or its something that they personally do not want to attain.
Seriously, stop it
Stop investing into people prematurely. Stop allowing these people to use you, ruin you and stop your personal process. Stop being so quick to emotionally and mentally attach yourself to people. Allow them to be themselves before you force yourself to fall “in love” with these people. Stop making “love” a goal. Aspire to be a better man or woman. Aspire to get a higher education, to work within your career field of choice and/or start that business. Go out and enjoy life. Have fun. Choose to live. Stop chasing people and stop celebrating them for being decent people. Stack your coins. Regrow your edges. Align your chakras. Lose weight. Create Peace within yourself. Align your spirit with a higher power. And walk in your worth.