Money talk for every stage of relationships
If you want to share all sorts of wonderful things with your partner, it means you share your love, family, intimacy, and even not-so-romantic things such as debts and budgets. Although balancing money and relationship is challenging, it is essential to talk about financial issues if you want to maintain a long-lasting relationship. So, how to talk about money skillfully at every stage of relationships? Scroll down to know more.
1. Don’t talk about money too early
It is not necessary to talk about money within the first 6 months of your relationship. During this period, you should spend time studying your partner’s characteristics, career, family, and so on. Talking about money in the first stage may point out that you are a pragmatic and greedy person, although you are not. Therefore, share your daily stories, your future goals, your experience, and something like that to impress your partner and avoid talking about money.
2. Know your partner’s spending habits
After 6 months and several times of dating, you may understand your partner’s spending habits, right? If not, start to conserve. Pay attention to the subtle way he spends his money and talks about his career goals. When your relationship becomes more serious, you should know your honey’s debts, retirement funds, savings, and financial goals, especially when you are going to get married. You should also take a look at your future spouse’s credit reports to have a sense of his outstanding debts and credit card accounts. You may trust your partner but trust and verify is different.
However, do not concentrate too much on the loans or debts in the past, what your partner is doing to fix the problem is much more important.
3. Discuss your financial goals
Discussing the long-term goal is essential to understand your honey’s financial mindset. Does he plan to retire early to travel the world or he is going to find a new job with a higher salary? Talking about these fantasies is a fun way to bring up the other’s real-world financial concerns. It also gives you a chance to change your money plan, if necessary.
4. Consult a financial advisor
You have discussed a lot but your spouse and you still have irreconcilable goals, it is about time for you to consult a financial advisor. He will give you the best advice to help balance your money and relationship. He will weigh in on your arguments and then figure out workable solutions to satisfy both of you.
5. Decide when to link your accounts but don’t join all
You are advised to wait until your marriage to join or link bank accounts. It is better to maintain separate accounts but have a joint account for household expenses. Also, make sure your savings and investment strategies are not against the other.
Many couples join all of their money but it is not a smart decision. One of the biggest mistakes couples make is to join their accounts too early. If you have a terrible relationship and break up, the other may take all of your money and run away. According to financial experts, it is never too early to start talking about money but joining accounts at the beginning stage of a relationship is not a should-do thing.
Intelligent people often start sharing expenses when they move in or have children. When their lives are better connected, more money will be transferred into the joint account. They also divide costs clearly to create a degree of independence while avoiding awkward money talks when the relationship gets worse.
6. Say no to slush funds
Many people confess that they have a slush fund that their spouses do not know, such as a hidden credit card or bank account. Unfortunately, this can be a harmful behavior because their partners will lose their faith when slush funds are detected or it may lead to money deficit due to unreasonable spending.
If you find that your better half is raising a slush fund, you should treat him ingeniously. Don’t be angry or feel uncomfortable. You should talk to him gently to find out the reason and work together to find a solution. This way, your honey will be more honest later on.
Money is not the major concern in a marriage; however, when financial conflicts start, they tend to last for a long time and seriously hurt other relationships. If you cannot find a common solution yourself, you can consult a financial expert before the problem gets too bad. Asking for the third party’s consultation is nothing wrong. Remember that a happy marriage is your goal, not anything else, so don’t let the unnecessary financial problems negatively affect your life.